Rifke, you are articulating something very important here, I think.
I'm bolding some of your key points:
Having sympathy for people suffering these various dysphorias is important.
Not abusing them is incredibly important.
I am sorry if Viva Hate or anyone else at this forum has been genuinely abused or attacked for such things.
But indulging ideas that appear false to us or - worse - being forced to indulge ideas that are false for fear of falling foul of the Politically Correct Police is something else.
And it is all more problematic than many, many people realise - for the whole of society.
I posted this video once before here, but I'm posting it again.
I fear the young Americans in this video are actually frightened of not being Politically Correct. I fear they have been bullied/harassed into denying the reality in front of their eyes:
Gender Identity: Can a 5'9, White Guy Be a 6'5, Chinese Woman?
oh my god, those people were so fearful. it was cringey. that girl who kept saying "good for you", i wanted to punch her in the face.
the thing is though, you can be as deluded as you want. but when you ask someone else to join in your delusion and validate it, that's not fair. you cant do that. it's okay as far as im concerned if that guy really did think he was 6'5, but if i was forced to pretend that he was just to validate his belief, then i would be somewhat annoyed. and my thinking is, the more you need other people to validate your identity for you, the less valid it becomes. also are you free to express yourself when it crosses over into cultural appropriation? i mean, these people who are saying "good for you" when the white guy says he's chinese are undoubtedly the same people that would act all scandalized if someone appeared in black face (what if a person feels like they're black on the inside, then is it okay?).
why is it not acceptable to appropriate another culture, but it's acceptable to appropriate another gender? as posie parker says: how do you know you feel like a woman if you're not a woman? how do you know what that feels like, when you dont have the lived experience of being a woman? you cant just pretend that putting on make-up and a wig is the same thing. it's offensive, the same way it's offensive to native americans if you dress up as them for halloween.
and im not saying that trans people are deluded. honestly, i dont know how they feel. maybe they really were born in the wrong body. i dont have their experience as a trans person and i never will, just as they dont have mine as an adult female and never will.