Morrissey letter to (presumably) Alan Bennett

thought I’d show this wonderful piece of history off...

U.K. Vauxhall & I LP with 2 posters, one with a handwritten letter on the back from Morrissey, to “Alan”, presumably Alan Bennett, Morrisseys ex neighbour, friend and playwright, hence the references to ‘A Visit From Miss Prothero’ & ‘Intensive Care’, which were plays written by Alan, and adapted for television by the BBC in 1978 & 1982, respectively). Morrissey also makes mention of his album (Vauxhall) being the current U.K. #1 album, which acts a decent time stamp for when the letter was written, likely between 26th March ‘ - April 2nd, 1994.

(Poster measures 30 inches x 20 inches, making it one of the largest pieces of handwritten Morrissey text I’ve ever seen)

 
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Peppermint

Well-Known Member
I call FAKE.

1) The handwriting is not convincing.
2) Bennett is a notorious hoarder and would never ever dispose of correspondence.
I think it's real. I've seen Moz handwriting like that, with the capital Ts in the middle of sentences. That loopy 'p' is also familiar. When you look at other authentic pieces that have turned up over the years, his handwriting seems to change style as often as other people change their socks.

This also has the hallmarks of his weird syntax - 'Do you, I wonder?' and his poor grasp of grammar - 'before I left'. Plus the joke at the end, and in particular the way he phrases it, is total Moz.
 
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ordinaryboy86

Well-Known Member
I'm inclined to think it's real. I've seen Moz handwriting like that, with the capital Ts in the middle of sentences. That loopy 'p' is also familiar. When you look at other authentic pieces that have turned up over the years, his handwriting seems to change style as often as other people change their socks.

This also has the hallmarks of his weird syntax - 'Do you, I wonder?' and his poor grasp of grammar - 'before I left'. Plus the joke at the end, and in particular the way he phrases it, is very Moz.

inclined to think so? It’s a stone wall certainty, as good as it gets. Anyone who thinks it ain’t real, shouldn’t really be having an opinion on it, cos they clearly don’t know what they’re talking about. It’s absurd to me to even respond to a trolling “Fake” claim, when it’s so clearly a superb genuine item. Oh well, there’s always one or two party poopers.
 

Peppermint

Well-Known Member
inclined to think so? It’s a stone wall certainty, as good as it gets. Anyone who thinks it ain’t real, shouldn’t really be having an opinion on it, cos they clearly don’t know what they’re talking about. It’s absurd to me to even respond to a trolling “Fake” claim, when it’s so clearly a superb genuine item. Oh well, there’s always one or two party poopers.
I was coming out in support of you, actually. I was just explaining the reasons why he was wrong.
 
T

The Irish Hare

Guest
Fascinating piece! I haven't read or watched those Alan plays, but I will get on it! (I am always being introduced to interesting things from Morrissey)... BUT why did he write "Before I left" instead of "Before I leave."? That doesn't seem like proper grammar to me, (but who am I kidding? I make grammatical mistakes ALL THE TIME!).
It's an Irish thing. All my family say it, eg. "I said I would talk to you before you left". Hiberno-English uses the tenses differently sometimes, because of the way Irish is spoken. Even if people aren't native Irish speakers the colloquialisms remain in common usage.
 

ordinaryboy86

Well-Known Member
I was coming out in support of you, actually. I was just explaining the reasons why he was wrong.

I wouldn’t even bother responding with logic to that idiot or giving any credence to his fake claims with a response, he’s clearly on a wind up.
 
A

Anonymous

Guest
We’re happy for artists to sign other artists’ stuff now?
Had I known who he was at the time it would have been a fantastic auto to have on a moz record cover. It is like I can now see how Alan probably thought it funny me having no idea who he was but maybe that made him relaxed as well.
Very weird the whole thing.
 
D

Deleted member 25370

Guest
thanks for sharing.
can we have more of this sort of thing?
 
A

Anonymous

Guest
thanks for sharing.
can we have more of this sort of thing?
As in me Urbanus being nice and not pretending to hate you?

I'll ask Santa. He claims that if I am nice I will get a ryzen 7 16 Gb RAM laptop.

Can you and me make peace and turn this Christmas into a special one?
 
A

Anonymous

Guest
As in me Urbanus being nice and not pretending to hate you?

I'll ask Santa. He claims that if I am nice I will get a ryzen 7 16 Gb RAM laptop.

Can you and me make peace and turn this Christmas into a special one?
Joke!

She would never talk to me here. 32 Gb RAM is tempting.
 
A

Anonymous

Guest
The hunters bring their guns
The butchers bring their blades
but alas! Wild T is to fast
and from their view he fades...
See ya later!
“Wild T is to fast”.

You’re fasting then? Eating nothing? Which sky-fairy has you undertaking such a silly pursuit at their behest?
 
A

Anonymous

Guest
As in me Urbanus being nice and not pretending to hate you?

I'll ask Santa. He claims that if I am nice I will get a ryzen 7 16 Gb RAM laptop.

Can you and me make peace and turn this Christmas into a special one?
16 GB RAM?

Think of the vitriol you can spew online, with THAT!

Another great reason to curl up, all cozy in Melvis’ wet, warm anus and punt low, from the darkness.

Bring a snorkel, so you can breathe as all the watery vegan sludge shoots past you the other way. ;)
 
A

Anonymous

Guest
16 GB RAM?

Think of the vitriol you can spew online, with THAT!

Another great reason to curl up, all cozy in Melvis’ wet, warm anus and punt low, from the darkness.

Bring a snorkel, so you can breathe as all the watery vegan sludge shoots past you the other way. ;)
With 32 Gb RAM I can rule the world and shut down the electric grid all over it.

Lights out!

Vitriol reminds me of the band My Vitriol and I've actually seen them live in Bristol of all places.
 
A

Anonymous

Guest
16 GB RAM?

Think of the vitriol you can spew online, with THAT!

Another great reason to curl up, all cozy in Melvis’ wet, warm anus and punt low, from the darkness.

Bring a snorkel, so you can breathe as all the watery vegan sludge shoots past you the other way. ;)
Any fooking smartphone comes with that and more. Going for a beast of a laptop that will roar in the corner and bite visitors.

Not that anyone in their right mind would visit me. Maybe the grenade and string on my front door tells people something.
 
A

Anonymous

Guest
Any fooking smartphone comes with that and more. Going for a beast of a laptop that will roar in the corner and bite visitors.

Not that anyone in their right mind would visit me. Maybe the grenade and string on my front door tells people something.
At that point... Nobody can argue that you’re not excelling in the realm of social graces! ;)
 

Ryan

Moderator
Moderator
Subscriber
You know how he feels? Are you an empath?

How Can Anybody Possibly Know How He Feels?

Correction: I wish he portrayed that humble mindset and way of life in the way he carries himself these days.
 
A

Anonymous

Guest
Alan should have done the narration for 'Sorrow Will Come in the End' - it would have been magnificent. Maybe there's time to get it done for the next re-re-re-issue? :)
 
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