, a month of music & I'm not a good boyfriend


mood: just opened a bottle of Jameson, so you tell me?
music: Skylar Grey, someone turned me onto her stuff a few days ago

What can I say, it was a crazy night, the barrage of fireworks lit up the sky and streets for hours on end, I have not heard or seen anything like it since the "Gulf War". Yes, I woke up screaming late in the night, dreaming of shooting people in green light and seeing explosions dulled to a faded green by my thermal sight, luckily someone was there to hold me and for once I let them, if only I had learned to do that years ago, but there are dreams that cannot be, anyways, on to a month of music

Discovered Rainbow Arabia about a month ago, really like them, I've always really liked music which is all over the place and this band fits that perfectly. I think Nick Cave is only number one because been playing him a lot since the uhh, "incident".
Eagles seem to have become one of my go to bands when I am drinking, don't know what that means. A lot of nerdy stuff on there too, mainly played in the morning to wake me up. Now on to the songs:

Interesting, I knew I felt a real connection to that rap song, but did not know it was by far the song I played the most last month. "Far From Any Road" getting some play too and also inspiring the playing of Nick Cave, I suppose I am re-examining some of the darker stuff still within me. There is a fine line, for some of us, between being brave and just being mean.
Speaking of which, so been at loose ends for a while since S. went home to visit her family for the vacation. We had a good night before she left, but I knew she had wanted me to go with her and I just could not bring myself to do it. Also, I knew that her ex, the guy her family wanted her to marry would be there, I am so not ready for that. Not that any of that makes up for what I have been up to since she's been gone, I just don't like being alone and L. was there. I know what part of me thinks I should do when S. gets back but you know what?
Out of sight, out of mind, right?
And since I may be going from Chengdu by summer, then why rock the boat?
All this I am only able to say by typing, the truth is, I feel real guilty and think am really no good about lying about this stuff. Perhaps it is just best to make a clean break when she gets back. Fact is I am not serious "relationship" material and may never be. Thats just the way it is...



ps: got to get up early to watch the Superbowl in a Western bar, so the bottle will help me get to bed early tonight, even 3 nights after "CNY" there is still fireworks going off in the middle of the night :rolleyes:
as for the game itself, just going more for the experience of seeing a bunch of other foreigners watching it, possibly explaining the rules to a few :cool:

Comments

Oh my god said:
Yeah, pandas all come from this part of China and its riding a "wooden horse"
which is the year which just started :thumb:

Aww, nice little tidbit of info there. You remind me of a bear... a cuddly bear. I am sure the ladies there would agree. :)
 
yeah, I am a cuddler :blushing: women, men, children, it matters not, I love to hug people now
its weird, I've probably hugged more people in the last 4 years then I did in all my life b4 then
I think it started with going to N.A. meetings, but also I love to pick children up and slowly spin them around
its great fun, oh, here I am off on a tangent :crazy::p:o
 
Oh my god said:
yeah, I am a cuddler :blushing: women, men, children, it matters not, I love to hug people now
its weird, I've probably hugged more people in the last 4 years then I did in all my life b4 then
I think it started with going to N.A. meetings, but also I love to pick children up and slowly spin them around
its great fun, oh, here I am off on a tangent.

Aww, that is sweet. It feels good to give a hug. And to receive one. :) Glad you are full of hugs.
 

Blog entry information

Author
Oh my god. it's Robby!
Views
12,791
Comments
5
Last update

More entries in General

  • Mount Joy
    Got several weeks of camping done this summer. My daughter and I were...
  • Hello Steven (Patrick)
    I am a BIG Smiths/Morrisey fan - not a stalker but appreciate those...

More entries from Oh my god. it's Robby!

  • the quarantine
    1. wearing a mask sucks, especially when I wear my glasses, every time...
  • shit
    I think I'm on the verge of having a girlfriend, yes she speaks...
  • bday
    a continuing record of the passage of time, this is what 47 looks like...
  • Halloween
    still getting use to sober Halloweens, did a spur of the moment really...
  • wtf, why do I have to do this twice!
    Dear China, 4 am here, day after National Day and well, just couldn't...

Share this entry

Top Bottom