Inside the head of... Morrissey - Daily Mail

'Who would I like to say sorry to? Myself. I put myself through torture': Inside the head of... Morrissey - Daily Mail

The Daily Fail with an 'interview' with Morrissey - zero indication of where or when. With him being very low key, it would have been nice for a bit of background.
Article by Olivia Buxton. 20th, May, 2017.

For those not wanting to give the rag any 'clicks':

Born Steven Patrick Morrissey in Lancashire in 1959, the frequently outspoken former Smiths frontman, singer and author turns 58 tomorrow. His bookish song lyrics were hailed as the finest in rock music, yet his novel ‘List Of The Lost’ won the ‘Bad Sex In Fiction’ award in 2015.

What is your earliest memory?

Being carried on my mother’s shoulders… up and down the living room… nothing’s changed since then.

What sort of child were you?

Perfect in every way.

What is the worst thing anyone has ever said to you?

A journalist told me that my audience is identical to Barry Manilow’s. This was bone-chilling to hear. I left the room.

Who would like to say sorry to and why?

Myself. I put myself through torture. One cancelled show and I lower my face on to a hot stove for six weeks.

Last row you had?

I once sat on the next table to Judge Judy, and for three solid hours she would not stop talking. The woman sitting with her contributed one or two umms, but Judge Rude-y could not shut up. I was ready to ram her face into her own spaghetti.

Tell us a secret about yourself

I have never had a cup of coffee in my entire life. That’s exciting, isn’t it?

What one law would you change?

All meat products should have a MEAT KILLS government health warning because meat production kills the consumer, kills the planet, kills animals. So why is it legal? Since meat causes more damage than tobacco, why only a health warning on tobacco?

Which words or phrases do you overuse?

Finishing a sentence with ‘and so on’ when in fact there’s nothing else to add.

Have you ever cheated death?

Four times.

Who would play you in a film of your life?

I cannot be replicated.

What is the worst job you’ve done?

I was a filing clerk for the Inland Revenue for a few weeks. I ought to have been put to death for that.

What is your worst habit?

I side with anyone who takes the most cynical view.

What is your guiltiest pleasure?

I know every episode of The Big Valley (1965-69) line by line. It isn’t helpful.

If you could go back in time, where would you go?

London’s East End of 1888. The anonymity fascinates me, the rolling fog, the narrow turnings, the prospect of sudden death, a knees-up at The Old King’s Vomit…

When was the last time you cried?

The election of Predicament Trump. He’s a child impersonating an adult, isn’t he? And I can’t forgive him for the sugar-capped teeth and slippery smile of Kellyanne Conway.

What’s the one thing every man should know about women?

Whether male or female, there is always a flaw in the manufacturing.

Who would your dream dinner date be?

I’ve never been on a date, so I’m not even sure what one is.

What’s one skill everyone should have?

The ability to listen. Judge Judy does not have this… which is why she’s a judge.

What’s the worst pain you’ve experienced?

Being a teenager in Seventies Manchester.

Have you ever had a nickname?

I wasn’t ever popular enough to have a nickname.

What song do you want at your funeral?

Please Don’t Talk About Me When I’m Gone by Ethel Waters.

What’s the best kiss you’ve had?

None ever.

What’s the best piece of advice you’ve ever had?

‘You don’t project very well as a TV interview.’ I knew it was true.

Regards,
FWD.

Song mentioned:



UPDATE: 10:10 AM PT:

An anonymous person posted a scan of the print edition version:

40078_dailymail_20170521.jpg



UPDATE May 23:

Additional question posted on Jesse's Twitter (link posted by Famous When Dead) and Mando's wife's Instagram, (link posted by an anonymous person):

Stop the press!
Jesse Tobias tweeted:
View attachment 41586
Regards,
FWD.

Jesse is not the only one. Mando's wife has the same message on her instagram



A message from #Morrissey... Although the Daily Mail in London printed a q&a with Morrissey yesterday they refused to print the following response: Mail: Which person do you most dislike? Morrissey: Theresa May for saying "I fully support fox-hunting." She doesn't realize that foxes are mothers and fathers and brothers and sisters.
 
Last edited by a moderator:
'Who would I like to say sorry to? Myself. I put myself through torture': Inside the head of... Morrissey - Daily Mail

The Daily Fail with an 'interview' with Morrissey - zero indication of where or when. With him being very low key, it would have been nice for a bit of background.
Article by Olivia Buxton. 20th, May, 2017.

For those not wanting to give the rag any 'clicks':

Born Steven Patrick Morrissey in Lancashire in 1959, the frequently outspoken former Smiths frontman, singer and author turns 58 tomorrow. His bookish song lyrics were hailed as the finest in rock music, yet his novel ‘List Of The Lost’ won the ‘Bad Sex In Fiction’ award in 2015.

What is your earliest memory?

Being carried on my mother’s shoulders… up and down the living room… nothing’s changed since then.

What sort of child were you?

Perfect in every way.

What is the worst thing anyone has ever said to you?

A journalist told me that my audience is identical to Barry Manilow’s. This was bone-chilling to hear. I left the room.

Who would like to say sorry to and why?

Myself. I put myself through torture. One cancelled show and I lower my face on to a hot stove for six weeks.

Last row you had?

I once sat on the next table to Judge Judy, and for three solid hours she would not stop talking. The woman sitting with her contributed one or two umms, but Judge Rude-y could not shut up. I was ready to ram her face into her own spaghetti.

Tell us a secret about yourself

I have never had a cup of coffee in my entire life. That’s exciting, isn’t it?

What one law would you change?

All meat products should have a MEAT KILLS government health warning because meat production kills the consumer, kills the planet, kills animals. So why is it legal? Since meat causes more damage than tobacco, why only a health warning on tobacco?

Which words or phrases do you overuse?

Finishing a sentence with ‘and so on’ when in fact there’s nothing else to add.

Have you ever cheated death?

Four times.

Who would play you in a film of your life?

I cannot be replicated.

What is the worst job you’ve done?

I was a filing clerk for the Inland Revenue for a few weeks. I ought to have been put to death for that.

What is your worst habit?

I side with anyone who takes the most cynical view.

What is your guiltiest pleasure?

I know every episode of The Big Valley (1965-69) line by line. It isn’t helpful.

If you could go back in time, where would you go?

London’s East End of 1888. The anonymity fascinates me, the rolling fog, the narrow turnings, the prospect of sudden death, a knees-up at The Old King’s Vomit…

When was the last time you cried?

The election of Predicament Trump. He’s a child impersonating an adult, isn’t he? And I can’t forgive him for the sugar-capped teeth and slippery smile of Kellyanne Conway.

What’s the one thing every man should know about women?

Whether male or female, there is always a flaw in the manufacturing.

Who would your dream dinner date be?

I’ve never been on a date, so I’m not even sure what one is.

What’s one skill everyone should have?

The ability to listen. Judge Judy does not have this… which is why she’s a judge.

What’s the worst pain you’ve experienced?

Being a teenager in Seventies Manchester.

Have you ever had a nickname?

I wasn’t ever popular enough to have a nickname.

What song do you want at your funeral?

Please Don’t Talk About Me When I’m Gone by Ethel Waters.

What’s the best kiss you’ve had?

None ever.

What’s the best piece of advice you’ve ever had?

‘You don’t project very well as a TV interview.’ I knew it was true.

View attachment 41573

Regards,
FWD.

Song mentioned:


Gee, thanks FWD! :thumb:
When the daily fail mentions him in any way, THE answer to the question if he is still relevant has been given now! :eek: :D

Nice and interesting "interview" though.
I would say, he is pretty much his usual self.
People don't change. Well not the inner personality.:)
 
Funny but not very revealing. The big valley part struck me as funny. I watch that show a lot though I'm unsure why
 
Obviously, the interview was conducted in the usual manner (via email), otherwise, there would be follow up questions. Like the one about being close to death 4 times. Now we will never know. Too bad.
 
I agree with Moz that it is important for a film to be good that it has a nice flow.
 
Obviously, the interview was conducted in the usual manner (via email), otherwise, there would be follow up questions. Like the one about being close to death 4 times. Now we will never know. Too bad.

If we believe his statements in the past then it would have been as a child (about three years old), when he had his ulcer in 2013 (doctors warned me: ‘A few weeks ago you almost died, and now you say you’ll do 18 shows more? Are you trying to kill yourself?’ In fact, I think that was what I was doing.”) and, of course, after the food poisoning in 2013 ("I officially died for nine minutes), although I'm sure that this was a joke.
 
It's entirely appropriate that Moz should speak to the Daily Mail - the most right-wing, anti-immigrant newspaper in the UK. He'll feel right at home. :sick:

Well, maybe they showed interest and all the other left-wing, pro-immigrant papers didn't.
Moz does not care about that.
 
- Almost being kidnapped for ransom in Mexico
- Deadly tomato pasta (resulting double pneumonia)
- Barretts's Esophagus
- Car accident reference in That's How People Grow Up ("I crashed and broke my spine") and another one in 2013

There may be others earlier in his life that usurp these.

Obviously, the interview was conducted in the usual manner (via email), otherwise, there would be follow up questions. Like the one about being close to death 4 times. Now we will never know. Too bad.
 
Mystic River by ultra conservative Clint Eastwood. I see snowflakes melting from their own tears in here.
 
- Almost being kidnapped for ransom in Mexico
- Deadly tomato pasta (resulting double pneumonia)
- Barretts's Esophagus
- Car accident reference in That's How People Grow Up ("I crashed and broke my spine") and another one in 2013

There may be others earlier in his life that usurp these.

Well, it could be, but isn't he exaggerating a bit here?
 

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