@The Truth

rifke

team bougatsa
how many f***ing user accounts do you have, dave, and how is it allowed to go on?
 

The Truth.

On Timeout
Dave never gets laid so he has plenty of time to create all these user accounts, rifke! It's how he keeps his libido at bay (sorry if I made you recoil in horror at the thought of Dave's libido). Some people go on Tinder in an attempt to find a new partner; Dave sublimates those desires by creating new morrissey-solo accounts. Maybe it's like roleplay for him and we're all the unwilling participants. But if anything this behaviour he engages in is a positive for people looking for a relationship in Dave's home state of California because it keeps Dave far away from the dating scene.

Relief Im So Relieved GIF by Padma Lakshmi


:handpointup:the people of California in unison
 

rifke

team bougatsa
i cant believe dave lives in california. i thought for sure he lived in missouri or something.
 

The Truth.

On Timeout
It's what he claims anyway rifke but we have to be careful where dave-o is concerned because you know he likes to pull the wool over our eyes as it works as a distraction and helps him to temper his libidinous urges for a while, in the absence of human touch. "In the absence of human touch" should be his epitaph, in fact. He probably does live in Missouri, or maybe Nebraska.
 
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The Truth.

On Timeout
Dave's theme song:

"Can anybody find me somebody to love?
Ooh, each morning I get up I die a little
Can barely stand on my feet
(Take a look at yourself) Take a look in the mirror and cry (and cry)
Lord, what you're doing to me (yeah yeah)
I have spent all my years in believing you
But I just can't get no relief, Lord!
Somebody (somebody) ooh somebody (somebody)
Can anybody find me somebody to love?

I work hard (he works hard) every day of my life
I work 'til I ache in my bones
At the end (at the end of the day)
I take home my hard earned pay all on my own
I get down (down) on my knees (knees)
And I start to pray
'Til the tears run down from my eyes
Lord, somebody (somebody), ooh somebody
(Please) can anybody find me somebody to love?"

 

rifke

team bougatsa
haha :lbf:
or:

Streets damp and warm
Empty smell metal
Weeds between buildings
Pictures on my hard drive
But I'm the luckiest guy
Not the loneliest guy

Steam under floor
Shards by the mirrors frame
Clouds green and low
No sign, no nothing now
But I'm the luckiest guy
Not the loneliest guy

All the pages that have turned
All the errors left unlearned, oh
Well I'm the luckiest guy
Not the loneliest guy
In the world
Not me
Not me


david bowie feels your pain, dave-o!! (except not really because david bowie was the sex)
 
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The.Truth.

about Ruth
Dave's theme song:

"Can anybody find me somebody to love?
Ooh, each morning I get up I die a little
Can barely stand on my feet
(Take a look at yourself) Take a look in the mirror and cry (and cry)
Lord, what you're doing to me (yeah yeah)
I have spent all my years in believing you
But I just can't get no relief, Lord!
Somebody (somebody) ooh somebody (somebody)
Can anybody find me somebody to love?

I work hard (he works hard) every day of my life
I work 'til I ache in my bones
At the end (at the end of the day)
I take home my hard earned pay all on my own
I get down (down) on my knees (knees)
And I start to pray
'Til the tears run down from my eyes
Lord, somebody (somebody), ooh somebody
(Please) can anybody find me somebody to love?"

This isn't "clever." Wouldn't my song be "Unlovable" or "I Want The One I Can't Have" or one of the dozen other songs by Morrissey or The Smiths?
#TryHarder
 

The Truth.

On Timeout
This isn't "clever." Wouldn't my song be "Unlovable" or "I Want The One I Can't Have" or one of the dozen other songs by Morrissey or The Smiths?
#TryHarder

Won't anybody find you somebody to love? Dave, maybe the next time somebody tries to break into your 'house' you should proposition them instead of chasing them away with a baseball bat. Potential partners aren't going to keep falling out of the sky like this, you know. Maybe you could have considered him less of a night-time burglar and more of a "midnight caller". The next time you hear the door handle rattling at 3am, prop yourself up on your pillow with one elbow and say: "oh, so you're trying to gain entry? How about you enter me instead?" :thumb:
I usually wouldn't advise something like that, but desperate times call for desperate measures, and in your case they're definitely desperate times. Maybe you can even start leaving the door unlocked!

Killer Queen Advice GIF by NETFLIX
 

The.Truth.

about Ruth
Won't anybody find you somebody to love? Dave, maybe the next time somebody tries to break into your 'house' you should proposition them instead of chasing them away with a baseball bat. Potential partners aren't going to keep falling out of the sky like this, you know. Maybe you could have considered him less of a night-time burglar and more of a "midnight caller". The next time you hear the door handle rattling at 3am, prop yourself up on your pillow with one elbow and say: "oh, so you're trying to gain entry? How about you enter me instead?" :thumb:
I usually wouldn't advise something like that, but desperate times call for desperate measures, and in your case they're definitely desperate times. Maybe you can even start leaving the door unlocked!

Killer Queen Advice GIF by NETFLIX
This inability to believe that I live in a house is puzzling. But it's not interesting.

I do think you're making progress in your own journey towards self actualization though, by making posts instead of just voting. As far as the sex thing, I can't compete with you. :mad: Who could resist someone that can quote posts from five years ago? I'm sure you're a stunning conversationalist.
#PantyDropper
 

The Truth.

On Timeout
I do think you're making progress in your own journey towards self actualization though, by making posts instead of just voting.

Why, so you can keep closer tabs on me, Dave? You're obsessed with making sure that I post from an account, you've brought it up many times over the past 18 months, and supposedly doing so is now "self-actualizing". It's for reasons like these, these fixations of yours, that rifke and I believe you need to get laid (as it's apparent that it hasn't happened for you in a very long time). Maybe if you change your attitude towards rifke and Bun Bun for a while, rifke might be able to convince Bun Bun to give you a few dating tips. Then you can find someone for yourself instead of daydreaming about Bun Bun's picture where he licks an ice cream cone. But change comes from within Dave, we can only help you up to a point. And going back to "self-actualization": you don't get to choose when or how I choose to post just like I don't get to decide how many different accounts you post from; although @davidt should really look into it.
 

The.Truth.

about Ruth
Why, so you can keep closer tabs on me, Dave? You're obsessed with making sure that I post from an account, you've brought it up many times over the past 18 months, and supposedly doing so is now "self-actualizing". It's for reasons like these, these fixations of yours, that rifke and I believe you need to get laid (as it's apparent that it hasn't happened for you in a very long time). Maybe if you change your attitude towards rifke and Bun Bun for a while, rifke might be able to convince Bun Bun to give you a few dating tips. Then you can find someone for yourself instead of daydreaming about Bun Bun's picture where he licks an ice cream cone. But change comes from within Dave, we can only help you up to a point. And going back to "self-actualization": you don't get to choose when or how I choose to post just like I don't get to decide how many different accounts you post from; although @davidt should really look into it.
You always want to involve other posters and in a way I get it. Then you can sit back and watch while I argue with them. It has even worked in the past so I can't say it never served a purpose but it does make you look insecure and unsure of your own abilities. That's sad because you really are clever and generally I'd give you a B- which is a pretty good grade. (For comparison those others you mention are maybe a D and it's sad you feel you need their help.)
That's why I talked about self actualization.
I do think it's strange that you want to involve the site administrator in it, though. Not a good strategy. You're using my name and my avatar, and you're making a complaint in The Pigsty, and those are all against the rules. Three strikes and you're out, right?
But I hope that David won't ban you because I think you're entertaining.
The reason I think you should post with the same accounts you use to downvote people is so they are not confused. I don't want people to think it's me.

But this is all boring. Your fantasies about me leaving my door unlocked were a lot more interesting to read as I am more curious about analyzing people and how their minds work. This "I'm going to attempt to troll you and then tell on you when it doesn't work out for me," stuff is boring and it really is beneath you and definitely beneath me.
#TryHarder
 
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