And empty and lonely.
My day started out nice.We went to see my little niece get an award at her school then we went to breakfast.I don`t know what the hell it is with me but my depression tends to get worse as the day goes on.I feel worse at night.I just lay in bed staring at the tv waiting for the meds to put me to sleep.I feel like it`s not a life.The thing is I`m tired.Tired of waiting for the meds to work.I don`t want to admit it but sometimes I get tired of just trying to be ok.It`s really hard when there is all this stuff going on in my head.It`s hard to concentrate on anything.It`s hard to feel sad all the time,it`s hard to feel empty and numb a great deal of the time.It`s hard to remember the last time I really felt alive and awake.I feel like I`m sleepwalking through life.I want to enjoy and participate in life but my head is filled with anxious and worried thoughts.Maybe life is just like this for some people....people like me.I don`t want to accept that and I don`t want to live my life like this.I want to enjoy the blue sky and the people I love.I want to be better for them.I just don`t know how to get better.
My day started out nice.We went to see my little niece get an award at her school then we went to breakfast.I don`t know what the hell it is with me but my depression tends to get worse as the day goes on.I feel worse at night.I just lay in bed staring at the tv waiting for the meds to put me to sleep.I feel like it`s not a life.The thing is I`m tired.Tired of waiting for the meds to work.I don`t want to admit it but sometimes I get tired of just trying to be ok.It`s really hard when there is all this stuff going on in my head.It`s hard to concentrate on anything.It`s hard to feel sad all the time,it`s hard to feel empty and numb a great deal of the time.It`s hard to remember the last time I really felt alive and awake.I feel like I`m sleepwalking through life.I want to enjoy and participate in life but my head is filled with anxious and worried thoughts.Maybe life is just like this for some people....people like me.I don`t want to accept that and I don`t want to live my life like this.I want to enjoy the blue sky and the people I love.I want to be better for them.I just don`t know how to get better.